This pregnancy is....

Getting to me so far.  I'm not a very good sick person.  Especially when it comes to nausea/vomiting.  I hate it and I talk myself out of it as much as I can yet it still keeps coming back.  Last night was horrible.  I laid in the fetal position all night long.  I'm sure there will be an ER trip here soon to get some IV fluids and some Zofran.  I have no patience left and no energy.  Dealing with 2 kids and dog takes a toll on me. I hate feeling dehydrated and I would really love to chug a big glass of water but water makes me so nauseous that even the thought of doing that turns my stomach.  This is my 4th time being pregnant and I'm just a little bit emotional with everything going.  I know this is a normal part of pregnancy but what isn't normal is being so sick that you start to lose massive amounts of weight and all food starts to turn your stomach.  The same thing is happening as what happened in my last pregnancy.  I lost a good 30 pounds in the first 2.5 months.  That is not good!!  So far in 5 days I've lost 4 pounds.  Now don't get me wrong, weighing as much as I did when I got pregnant going into month 9 is great, but it also means that the first 3 months of my pregnancy were a hell hole.  And every doctor is telling you your weight gain is insufficient.  Well I lost 30 pounds and gained 30 pounds.  Does that mean I was suppose to gain 60?  My body won't let me do that.  Even during pregnancy I have a high metabolism and I do have a tendency to watch what I eat so I definitely eat healthier during pregnancy, exercise more and all of this equals a steady weight gain or not so much as all.  I just want the nausea to go away so I can enjoy a glass of milk or some cereal.  I know no matter what that I will lose weight during my first 3 months.  Has been this way for each pregnancy.  Even with my first when I for sure thought I wasn't pregnant, I had an insatiable craving for Gatorade.  Thus this turned into not drinking soda and not really wanting to eat out... 1+1=2 right.  So not drinking soda (which is linked to weight gain) and not eating out (which is also linked to weight gain) equals that I lose weight.  I lost between 20-25 pounds during that pregnancy.  Gained it all back though.

So what does this all lead up to?....

Well I know friends and family have good intentions but please think before you say.  If you were in my shoes would you want to hear what you are going to say?

Here is a list of things not to say to a pregnant woman while dealing with such severe nausea/vomiting also known as hyperemesis gravidarum:

-Well you wanted to be pregnant so just deal.
-Just know that this means it is a healthy pregnancy and your baby is growing.
-Just enjoy it.
-Aren't you lucky that you get to lose weight.  (I don't consider myself lucky at all)
-Just think, you won't have to deal with it forever.

There are many more but I'm tired of thinking.

Pregnant women live in the moment.  I try to be positive and tell myself everyday that this will be gone in...5 more weeks...hopefully.  But that doesn't help.  I want it to go away now.  I want my energy back and I want to eat.  I love food.  I love to cook,  But looking into my fridge makes me want to pass out and vomit.  I know relief will come one day.  More than likely it'll be in the form of an IV and a pill.  Until then I will just go lay in my bed.


*If anybody has said the above mentioned things not to say to me, don't be offended.  I'm emotional and hormonal.  I know you meant in the best way possible.*